I Love You – Have a Cookie!

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As my husband lay in a hospital bed, recovering from a total hip replacement, I searched diligently for a way to show my love and support. Then, I found the perfect answer, “licorice and Oreo cookies!”

After 50 years in the workforce, my mother is retiring. Though she is not happy about it, I want to find a way to celebrate her many years of hard work. Oh, I know! I will bake her a pie. A cherry pie! That is her favorite.

Hard to believe, but our oldest son, Craig is turning 27. He is a wonderful young man with a great wife and an adorable son, Skyler. That surely is cause for a special family dinner. Prime rib, all the trimmings and of course, I will bake a cake.

I suspect that many of you are just like me. Even after 19 years as a weight loss surgery patient, when I feel the need to show my love, support or appreciation for someone I use food. It seems we all do. And that, I am afraid, has been the case since the beginning of time- you know, killing the fatted calf and all that. We love, we celebrate and we motivate with food.

I have been wondering if it would be a futile endeavor, or would it actually be possible to change this behavior? Now, I know that I cannot be responsible for everyone else, but I can be responsible for the choices I make. One day, one event and one holiday at a time.

So, now that the good candy from the gingerbread house is about gone… along comes another sweet holiday, Valentines Day. You know, expensive dinners, heart-shaped cookies, cakes, and candy.

In years past, Valentines Day has been the perfect excuse to bake giant heart-shaped sugar cookies with white icing and red sprinkles. But, this year I am going to do things differently. I know, it will be tough, now that Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups come in a heart shape, but I am committed to showing my love for my family and friends without using food! I have decided to spend my cookie baking time, writing heartfelt letters and notes of appreciation to those I love. My hope is that my words will fill their hearts, and that they will feel loved and appreciated, warmed and emotionally fed, and that they will not miss the cookies.

Won’t you join me this Valentines Day, by doing what you can to fill someone’s heart – rather than their stomachs? I love you – here’s a note!

No Tomorrow?

26148980Well, the world did not end this week either! I am glad about that, how about you? It seems that whenever a year ends, or natural disasters abound and cosmic events like this year’s eclipse, or the spooky cools super moons show up, people start to talk about the end of the world. Of course, most of us do not know when our lives will end, but if we did…

I have always wondered if I would make any changes in my life, do things differently, or refocus my priorities if I knew my life would end on a specific day. I don’t know that I would. I learned a great lesson from my grandmother many years ago. At a young age she was told that she had a hole in her heart that could not be repaired. She was told day after day, week after week, month after month and even year after year that she had just a few days left to live.
My grandmother, Pearl, lived each day as if it were her last. She spent her time reading and studying. Gathering family around her and telling stories. She called family members often just to say hello and to let them know of her love.  She was careful not to offend. If she did, she quickly apologized. Her priorities were clear to all – faith and family. What a wonderful example to follow!

On Christmas Eve this year we lost a very dear family member after a short (thank goodness) battle with ALS. (Lou Gehrig’s Disease). It came on quickly, destroyed her body one muscle at a time, and she was gone. She knew there was no cure and it was moving very fast. She knew that she would likely not live but a few months more. Once she received and understood her fate, she immediately planned for her husband and daughter’s life without her. She made the decision to donate her body to the University of Utah for research. She had had polio, cancer, and now ALS. No doubt, much will be learned from her generous gift. Then, she planned her funeral service. I have been asked to speak. I am honored and challenged by this request.

I can’t help but ponder her life, her death and contemplate what I might have done in the same situation. What if there were no tomorrow for me? I often wonder if it will take our being told that we only have a few weeks or months to live for us to spend our time on that which is most important? Are our lives “in order”? Would we have any regrets if today was our last?

Well. It appears we have a new year ahead of us. “Day by day, minute by minute, second by second we went from where we were to where we are now. Time never stands still; it must steadily march on… This is our one and only chance at mortal life—here and now. The longer we live, the greater is our realization that it is brief. I believe that among the greatest lessons we are to learn in this short sojourn upon the earth are lessons that help us distinguish between what is important and what is not.”  Thomas S. Monson (Who passed away January 3, 2018). 

As far as we know, there will be many tomorrows for us. May we all use this time, this season, this new beginning to re-focus, re-evaluate, and re-commit to those things most important to us in our lives. So, if tomorrow never comes…

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